Secret Revenge
by anon-anon-anon
Summary: Ok, This is first fanfiction so be nice and review lots! Basically, Holly has set up her detective buisiness and ends up working on three cases which seem to be linked but no one can really see how, until things have gone a little too far.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hello everyone, this would be my first fanfic, so comment **lots** but don't flame too much, my ego is a very delicate item P. OK I _dont_ see a way Colfer will write a romance into his books, but that aside I like writing romance and I have a feeling that that failing may well enter this fic, so apologies if you don't agree with it. Please read and review anyway as I make excuses for my vainly romantic nature.

Disclaimer: The characters belong entirely to Eoin Colfer, I have simply stolen them. I write in honour of his genius …. You kidding? My writing is more of an insult. Nah, I write because the characters are so good and I can't wait for the next book.

Anyway… long enough I think.

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**An Apartement, Haven City, The Lower Elements  
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Miss Holly Short lay in bed staring at the ceiling. There definitely were perks to being your own manager and working hours was one of the biggies. Holly Short never really had liked mornings. It must be about 11 now and no screaming Root to point out that she had effectively missed an entire shift in the previous week because of her tardiness and disrespect for LEP procedure. No Root at all. Holly's half smile twisted as she struggled to fight the heaving emotions inside her. He had been dead for nearly a year now and she still hadn't really got over it. Of course being accused of murder didn't really help clear the air.

It had been Opal Koboi who had murdered the commander and threatened to destroy all of fairy life. Opal Koboi had duped them all and set out on her revenge framing Holly, attempted to assassinate the humans who had helped in her previous defeat, and then leading the MudPeople straight to Haven in a large mass of molten iron. Opal Koboi was now rotting in maximum security, Howler's Peak - Foaly had arranged Holly a private visit. Normally goblin prisons weren't the top of the list for pixie criminals, but no one was going to take any more chances with Koboi. Not that she could actually do anything now, the HGH she had inserted into her body truly had turned her into a human and a 5 foot 9 creature was fairly easy to spot, considering the average height was only a meter. Being stripped of magic and money (although it had taken Foaly several months to find all her accounts), she was now virtually powerless and instantly recognisable as Public Enemy No.1.

The LEP had lost too much to take risks with this pixie, which was probably just as well, seeing as the only beings ever to face Opal and win were either dead or working in Short and Diggums Private Investigators. There was no way anyone would give Foaly another chance to brag, the paranoid equine was quite egocentric enough as it was, another victory over Koboi and his head would, almost literally, be the death of him. And that aside, some of the more observent fairies were harboring disguised doubts over the exact location of his loyalties. Well _one _observant fairy, but then again, Trouble Kelp wasn't really too sure of Commander Sool himself.

11.10 What time _had_ the centaur arranged to meet her for lunch? If she got up now she could be certain of her punctuality. But since when had Holly ever been punctual? Anyway, if she was too early Foaly might begin to think she actually enjoyed the work he brought her, and then where would she be. Holly turned over, thinking through the latest case. A pettie disagreement between some elves and sprites had quickly escalated into 2 attacks and abduction, and for a variety of reasons those involved had no wish to include the Lower Elements Police in the fun. Holly laughed. Since Sool had become commander she and Mulch had had almost twice as many contracts as the LEP had cases and she got paid. She had also helped Foaly out on many occasions, but that was just a service to a friend. And anyway how else could she pay for the equipment and information he supplied her with?

Now why would the owners of a prosperous elfin holiday company start a fight with a new, untested electronics company, exchange insults and then proceed to kidnap the daughter of the manager. It didn't make sense. Well she could ask Foaly about it over lunch.

A series of shrill "beeps" sounded across her room. Irritably Holly sat up, disentangled herself from her sheets and stumbled across the room to her computer. Who would want to talk to her now? Well actually several people now, considering the time.

"Unknown Caller – Audio and Video feed."

Holly accepted the call and turned to drag a chair over.

"Good evening Holly. I hope I find you tolerably well."

Holly swung around to see the screen barely managing to conceal her astonishment. The vampire like features of none other than Artemis Fowl faced her in the screen. The last member of Short and Diggums had finally managed to achieve the impossible.

"What…. How… you have some explaining to do Fowl!"

Holly spluttered - in a remarkably similar way to Commander Root but she wasn't to know that. Sool had ordered Foaly to monitor all Fowl's communications and was checking the results personally. It was only the fairy communicator which had allowed the to talk but that only worked one way. She had warned Artemis of this, and now he had successfully (it seemed) managed to bypass all Foaly's surveillance equipment. The centaur would not be happy with this

"Artemis… you know that Foaly is monitoring all you're communications. If you're caught… well my reputation is out. Sool will stop at nothing." 

"Holly, calm down and let me explain. I had inserted the communicator into one of my computers, believe me it took some time to work out the rewiring for a wireless device, but I managed it. I then used a school account and sent Foaly a virus. No not like that."

Artemis had obviously seen Holly's expression; hardly surprising seeing as he also had video feed.

"I sent several random e-mails mentioning the People, Foaly, you said, had been ordered to pick up on these. They were harmless enough, but once intercepted they allowed me to send a follow up virus, which blocks all communications from me to any Lower Elements device. Perfect really. Your number is plastered over almost every news site under the Earth, did you know that?"

"So you are saying" continued Holly, trying to understand, "that you have hacked into Foaly's system with spam to random e-mail addresses and using LEP safety precautions against humans to do so." Holly almost laughed. "And yes I was aware of it."

"I'm glad you approve. The amusing thing is that, I have hidden the virus in the computer data base of previously found viruses. The only place that wont be scanned hourly for any form of bug."

Now Artemis' smug smile was becoming unbearable, being a genius didn't always make you friends as Foaly knew well. Of course when you did make friends you tended to keep them – geniuses couldn't afford to be fickle.

"Ok, Mudboy, I get the picture… very clever, some day I shall tell Foaly just to see his face. Well what did you want?"

"When you tell Foaly, please video it and send the footage to me. And I still have a name, even if I do annoy you."

Artemis grinned as Holly fumed silently, she was actually more like the commander than she realised, but no one would tell her that, his memory hurt her too much.

"Anyway" he continued, "I have a slight problem, some fool has decided to e-mail me with a proposition for a hostage payment of £1000000 in gold."

"I presume you do not actually have the hostage?" Holly could never forget the success he had with her kidnap and ransom.

"No I do not! I thought you trusted me… The thing is, the message is written in Gnomish."

Holly's retort died on her lips.

"I think Foaly is going to have to find out about your virus sooner than expected, we need help. Mail me a copy of the demand, an exact one, I'll take it with me today when I see him for lunch. This is serious."

"I know it's serious. Why do you think I asked you? I must go now, this is taking a large amount of power, and I'd rather not have to explain to Father why there are abnormal power surges in the middle of the night originating from my computer. Goodbye"

"Goodbye Artemis"

The connection went dead. Holly sighed and rubber her temples. 11.45 she really should get going. A cool shower and a fresh set of moisturiser on her ears, they were peeling so much at the moment, most likely due to stress, would wake her up and put her on the ball so to speak. She stood up and saw the mirror.

"D'Arvit, is that how bad I look." She thought, then wondered why she actually cared.

15 minutes later she had picked up the ransom offer, and was jogging into the city centre to meet with a certain genius centaur. This wasn't going to be easy. But then, nothing fun ever was.


	2. Chapter 2

O highly acclaimed revievers the answer to all of you comments. caugh

Schizophrenic squirrel: I am **not **Eoin Colfer - though I wish I had his talents sigh. I also hope I am not touched by writers block, it is such an inconveniance. Ahh yes... the letter. Well seeing as I'm using the base trick of suspense to keep all you lovely people reading my story I doubt you will actually find out about the letter for a while :P. Then again I could change my mind. It all depends.

Silverfingers: Thanks! "the floor is lava"? enlighten me.

Disclaimer: I am a thief. All of this belongs to Eoin Colfer - but shhhh ... :P 

Anyway… long enough I think.

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**Fowl Manor, Ireland, Present Day**

Artemis Fowl stitched off the connection and leaned back in his chair, stretching a little. It would no doubt have been sensible for the 15-year-old to get some sleep, but that sort of depravation had never stopped him before. He reached out an abnormally pale hand to the mouse and quickly forwarded the ransom offer to Holly; this time without the decay virus.

That had taken some doing, incapacitating the virus, but since the ransom demand for Artemis Fowl Senior had been lost, his son had spent considerable quantities of time selectively re-programming his e-mail inbox. It now automatically disabled any problematic bugs keeping copies of them as a referance for future use. Since every "new" computer virus, was simply a variation on a previous, each one was linked, all Artemis had to do was to tell his computer this, and the machine learned. It saved him the job of constantly updating the software. Someday he could patent this, it would be worth a fortune; but did he really want the Swiss International Bank to be able to block the viruses he was sending? That was a question to ponder on a rainy day. Artemis almost chuckled - it sounded so ordinary.

The new programming had been difficult - attempting the seemingly impossible usually was - but the worth of the venture was now becoming evident, just as he had claimed to a somewhat dubious Juliet when she had last visited. The genius may not have been able to trace any message he was sent, but he could keep them, and re-read them and forward them to whoever he chose.

For example, he could forward the emails to a certain paranoid techy quite capable of using his advanced technology to track any message sent on Earth, or in it. Foally wouldn't stay out of this incident. It would require the commitment of all workers in Short and Diggums, even the unofficial ones. Artemis was sure of that.

He smiled to himself, to a causal observer it would seem more like a grimace, it was good to be able to work with the People again, life with them always seemed far more interesting.

But why was he being framed for a kidnap he had had nothing to do with? Artemis _had_changed from the cold-blooded schemer he had been three years previously. Holly had changed him. She had healed his mother, saved his father, forgiven him (he hoped) for her abduction and become his first true friend, always excepting Butler. He wouldn't even consider siuch a heartless act as that now. And yet he was being framed for one.

Artemis thought through all the people he could have offended during his association with the people, it was a long list, but they were all either dead, in prison or too stupid to think of such a plan. His communications were being monitered. If the LEP thought he was hiding another hostage, they wouldn't wait this time; it would be a quick and clean blue rinse, not even pausing to stop time. Artemis shuddered, twice was three times too often to come into contact with those things. The plan was almost flawless. Almost.

Without Holly and Foaly's help, not to mention the dwarf and the stash of LEP technology that had been building up in various locations around Tara, it _would _have been a flawless plan. As it was, he could still see several ways out. Artemis had given up on life once before; on the roof of an artificial temple surrounded by a pack of aroused and famished trolls, who could blame him. That had been embarrassing enough, there was not a chance he would ever repeat the experience.

A short reply buzzed up on the computer screen.

_Fowl_

Artemis wished she would stop calling her that, he did have a name and they had been friends for over a year now. No one had bothered to explain to the teenager, that it was because they were such good friends that Holly persisted in her familiar mode of address despite his protests. He had to work some things out for himself after all.

_Thanks, will take that to Foaly pronto. This is **BAD**. But you knew that. I'll ring (Your com no.?) when back. I have a headache case too. Get some sleep now!_

_Holly_

Artemis sighed, what was worth the ten seconds needed to turn a hurried message into comprehensible English.

Another heavy case. That wasn't good. Holly already looked exhausted; still highly attractive, but in desperate need of several weeks of solid sleep. Since leaving the LEP she had had a chance to let her hair grow slightly, and it now fell to her chin framing her face and accenting her hooked nose and hazel eyes. She had actually kept to the training program they had agreed on at the New Year – Winter Equinox – and it showed. Her body was as lithe and strong as ever. She was just so tired, and she was still torn by Root's death and her resignation from the LEP. She just needed a good month off, but criminals don't organise their time around you as Julius root had been so fond of pointing out.

He on the other hand had not become fit. The recurrent brushes with painful death had definitely made an impact on the boy, but even Butler's supervision could not create muscle from nothing. Artemis knew that. On the other hand, nothing so far had even got the better of him, and he wasn't going to let his own body be the first.

However hypocritical it was, Holly was right. Artemis mailed a quick assent to the message and slipped into bed.

**Shopping District, Haven, Lower Elements**

Holly was late again. The centaur was expecting it and took advantage of the time to complete his notes for Sool. 100 page booklet to fill out on security. Sool was taking his new role a little too far, but that was just Foaly's opinion. Unlike Root, Sool did not threated budget cuts, he simply enforced them. And for the most illogical reasons too.

_Page 68. 1. How would you describe the current security measures in your area of the LEP?_

Foaly was beginning to appriciate why Holly had quit. Working under Sool was like a constant choice between being burned and buried alive. The genius equine wasn't particularly enamoured with either option.

How would he answer this? The truth?

_Since I have personally invented all the security measures in the area I work in (Op.s Booth, in case the information wouldn't fit into the lump of tissue between your ears. )_ _I would obviously say that they it was the _most _secure building in the LEP. However, this would be seen, by some ignorant busibodies, as personal arogance so I shall back up my claims with a simple test. YOU try to get in! Trouble can't, Vinyaya can't, Root couldn't, even Holly failed. If you can I will eat my hat._

Foaly whinnied in delight. Sool's face when he saw that would be an absolute picture. Of course, being put on probation was not a particularly desirous consequence, but the centaur missed being yelled at by livid commanders (not that Sool would ever measure up to Root - who could?) and he had played "submissive Donkey boy" for far too long since his last wittitism - an entire 2.35 pages of forms.

_Page 68. 2. What would you suggest to improve security in the LEP?_

Foaly began to laugh again and then stopped realising that everyone in the cafe was staring at him. Well it wasn't his fault everyone recognised him from the "World of the Future" program (Advertising Channel 78683) was it? He wished they wouldn't insist on staring at him, celebrity status became a little wearing after a time.

He looked down again and continued phrasing his answer.

_As I see it, security is not the major issue that needs to be adressed at the LEP. It is one of ...  
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"Hello Foaly, sorry I'm late, got caught up."

"Holly," Foaly smiled, she had obviously run all the way there, "S'not a problem, I had this to do anyway. Don't laugh, Sool is a very conscientious commander of the LEP. Nettle Smoothie?."

"_Very_ conscientious," commented Holly reading through Foaly's answers, "Just don't get fired, I need your help on something. Take a look at this when you get the chance." She handed over a small disk, he took it with a questioning glance.

Foally looked at the expression on her face, quickly decided he liked his nose in it's current shape and altered the comment he had been about to make.

"Don't worry sweetie, they all know I'm irreplacable. I suppose I could spare a few minutes in my busy, underapriciated life to look over _your _work for you ..." placing the disk ceremoniously in his bag along with the form " and now shall pass on my delighful message."

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REVIEW. I'm not too sure of Foaly's character, please could someone point out what I have missed in it! 


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